This is Sarah. She is 2' 7.75" and weighs 20 lbs 2oz.
This is Matthew. He is 2' 8.75" and weighs 21lb 14oz.
Sugar and sweetness, right? Cuteness and bubbles, happiness and cuddles? Wrong.
You see, Sarah has an edge, a meanness streak and is the more aggressive of the two, while Matthew is more easy-going, mellow and forgiving. This combination means that Sarah literally pushes the poor guy around, and that he is at her peril, barring his toughening up and deciding to fight back.
Matthew and Sarah may be twins, but being "similar" does not mean being "identical". That they share the same spaces and schedules means there is no shortage of opportunities for their paths to cross. Should Matthew have a toy that Sarah wants, she will do what she can to get it. Should he be in her way, or even drinking his own milk from his own cup, when she has her own, she may decide she wants to be where he is or have his things, and she will physically intervene.
If Sarah spots Matthew has a popular toy, be it a book, a block, a stuffed animal, or even the TiVo remote, she will follow him and flat-out tackle the guy. She may grab the back of his outfit and pull him to the ground. She may smack him on the head with her open palm until she gets her reward. She may push him off a chair so she can sit there. And trust me, there's no remorse, even if he ends up in tears.
Yet it's clear Matthew would like nothing more than to please his sister. Every evening, as the two are put to bed in their cribs, we run the chance of hearing Matthew cry because, of all things, he has handed his blankets and stuffed animals over to her from crib to crib, and finding her asleep, he is alone and cold - requiring our intervention to retrieve said donated blankets and put them in their rightful place.
The twins just passed the 15 month stage, which means they are old enough to walk about with ease, but haven't yet mastered the art of communication, let alone sharing. Their early age makes clear discipline difficult as well. Aside from grabbing Sarah's arm on the way to hitting Matthew's cranium, or putting her in a strapped high chair to eat separately from him, there's not a whole lot of things we can do to protect his noggin from taking a flogging. And with his fair skin, if he gets pushed around, there is sure to be a red mark.
Last week, as Sarah read a book, having it open in her lap, Matthew walked by. Spotting him, she raised the book above her head and brought the spine down on him with an audible smack. That clearly took him by surprise.
The role Sarah takes in this relationship is much like the one I took with my younger siblings. Being the oldest of five, I made sure I could push my weight around and put the kids in their place. At one point, my parents even gave the younger siblings carte blanche to hit back, but most of the time, they didn't. Now, I can see it playing out in front of me, where Sarah, the younger (by minutes), smaller (by a pound and an inch), is being the bully. So don't let her cute smile fool you. She's plotting.
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